Sleepy

By | March 31, 2018

Sleep is a very individual thing.

Not only is adequate quality sleep necessary, people have different daily (“circadian”) rhythms – some people are most alert in the morning, others mid-day, and still others in the evening. Further, this does not seem to be due entirely to habits, and therefore we cannot just tell night owls to go to bed earlier.

I’ve had dim dumb dipshit motherfuckers tell me my whole life that my (admittedly, very unusual) sleep patterns are “unnatural.” Yet, when I try to adapt to a “normal” sleep pattern, even after months and months, I am tired literally every waking minute, my IQ is much lower, and I am irritable and grumpy all the time (well, grumpier). Sleeping normal hours, I also make far more mistakes at work, which is of course terrible for one’s career.

The biggest conflict in one relationship of mine was that I slept “too much.” I didn’t actually sleep too much, I just slept at hours my then girlfriend did not like. Of course it didn’t help, but to prove a point I began keeping track my sleep times and hers. I slept an average of 4.5 hours a day; she slept 9.5 a day.

I’m so angry about this because it gets very tiresome when something that is completely natural to you gets branded as horrible and unnatural your entire life. My parents tried to fix my sleep habits. Failed. The army tried. Failed. Partners have tried. Failed.

Ain’t gonna happen, in other words.