About a million adults assured me that by the time I was 30, I’d listen religiously to the same music I did when I was 16, would not ever try anything new, would never step outside of my comfort zone — just like them.

I knew they were fucking idiots even when I was 13, but now I’ve proven it with my life.

Sitting here listening to “Sweet Talk” by Kito and Reija Lee.

I listen to more pop and new music now than I did when I was 15. And I’ve done all the things nearly all those morons assured me that I could not do — at least those that I wanted to or cared about.

I’ve had an epic life. Just epic, and met a great partner because of it. Thank heaven I did not listen to any of those depressing doofuses. Thank heaven for this uncommon obstinate stubbornness I just seem to have been born with.

To all those North Florida dipshits and bullies and naysayers, fuck all of you. Every last one of you. You were shitting on me, but it turned out to be fertilizer. Joke’s on you now and forevermore, assholes.