Trynabe Funny

Judge Bent

Chill Annoying, Trynabe Funny

Do you judge people based on the car they drive?

No. But if they have a recumbent bicycle, I can guarantee they are slimy subhumans who subsist on a diet of donkey butts and octopus eyeballs. They abuse kittens and travel to faraway destinations for the explicit purpose of starving orphans.

They all somehow assassinated JFK and canceled Firefly. They are the ones who abscond with a single sock from the dryer, so you end up with no match.

The recumbent bicycle losers sneak in in the middle of the night and put mold on your bread and dust on your knickknacks.

There is no greater force of evil than recumbent bicycle riders. None.

Internal

Chill Trynabe Funny

How do you start interns?

After they hand-wash my car with a toothbrush, I point them at more advanced tasks like organizing the office supplies by color, size and country of origin. Then when that’s done, I make them put on a jester costume and cavort. If there is not enough cavorting, a taser can solve that most of the time.

Following their generous three minute lunch, I have them really dig into some work by doing some important gardening at my house. They must rent all the tools from me, of course. It’s only fair.

After that, I list them as dependents on my taxes and open some credit cards in their names.

And that’s a good start in the American economy for any intern.

Poison Apple

Chill Trynabe Funny

What Happens When You Remove Someone From Apple Family Sharing?

A drone is immediately dispatched bearing a single M67 fragmentation grenade. The disfavored family member is then hunted relentlessly and eliminated by the drone.

If the first drone is unsuccessful, a second is dispatched free of charge. If that fails, a space laser strike is undertaken as a last resort. This will result in an additional $200 fee on your Apple account.

Be aware of what will occur when you shame a family member so.

Solver

Chill Amusing, Trynabe Funny

What is this called ?

I name thee “Universal Computer Problem Solver.”

It resolves any computer headache instantly. Got an issue finding your Start menu that’s been in the same place for 30 years? Plug this handy-dandy device in and within fractions of a second it will no longer be your problem. Can’t recall the name of the application that you’ve used to do your daily work for 14 years? Slap this baby in and bam, it becomes a non-issue in a snap.

Yes indeed my friends, the UCPS can put the kibosh on all your computer annoyances instantly. Big or small, the UCPS solves ’em all!

And after you’re done fixing all your tech troubles, just leave the Solver plugged in and insert the USB connector into your mouth. It has a nice minty flavor that I’ll bet you just can’t wait to try.

No one has ever asked for a refund!