Java the Nut

I have the opposite problem. In my resumรฉ there is nearly nothing about programming, coding, or developing and yet I get recruiters sending me jobs for developer positions all the time. The latest one was for a Sr. Java developer. I have never once used Java, know almost nothing about the language itself, and have no interest in it at all. My resumรฉ doesn’t have that keyword or anything vaguely similar to that.

It was probably an algorithmic error, but how can the algorithm be so atrocious?

Crying Uncle

We ran into this same problem with the software my company distributes. I figured out the same thing. Yay, computing in 2019: problems are both nearly impossible to troubleshoot, and nearly incapable of being fixed, just so all the droolers don’t click on shit they should’ve never clicked on in a million years anyway. Meanwhile, a ton of other things break in an attempt at preventing your Uncle Milton from sending all his fucking money to Nigeria (and it doesn’t help, he sends it anyway).

Clipped

Clippy was the first popular (as in many people saw it) instance of ceding computing to the droolers, yet it also causes feelings of nostalgia because at least Clippy could be banished, never to be seen again, while modern software and computers are just permanently broken. Firefox and such can no longer be fixed. Same with Windows 10 and now even MacOS.