Why do frumpy/dumpy unemployed 62-year-old men and women think some young hot celebrity or any celebrity is into them? I think I’m more attractive than average and if “Jenna Ortega” contacted me and claimed she needed me to be her full-time lovin’ man I wouldn’t doubt for a single second it’s a scam. It would not even occur to me that it was real. The only way I’d believe it is if Jenna literally showed up at my door and presented me with two forms of photo ID and even then I’d be suspicious for a long while afterward.

So what in the hell is going on there?