It’s a real tragedy that the vast majority of men are taught early on that expressing any interest of any kind in a woman is harassment and is hurtful to the woman in question. This creates really fucked-up dynamics later on. I know feminists claim this does not occur, but it very much does; even apart from my pariah status as a kid I was taught that any expressed interest in a woman was harming her. So were all my friends. And I’ve talked to many, many other men who got the very same message.

I’m not here to blame feminism or anything in particular. There are multiple causes. But it is what happens. And it shouldn’t.