The worst bullying I ever received was in late middle school and early high school when I started dressing better, improving my fitness and in general trying to be more social.

It was only when I tried (and succeeded in, eventually) being more civilized and more interesting than I had been that people really tried to make sure I drowned in my previous life.

Heck, even some of my “friends” started to treat me poorly if not outright bully me after that. Until I got better friends.

Was thinking about this because of these Ani DiFranco lines.

and god help you if you are a phoenix
and you dare to rise up from the ash
a thousand eyes will smolder with jealousy
while you are just flying past

So true. So very true. People want you in the tomb they’ve constructed for you. When you tear down the bricks, blow the lid off, oh are they pissed.

But dammit, I did it — I went from a complete and utter reject in middle school whom nearly everyone hated to someone at least most people grudgingly respected, with many friends, and eventually managing to spend a year with one of the smartest and loveliest girls in the whole school as my girlfriend (to everyone’s surprise, including mine!).

But that phase transition — hoo boy, it was a doozy. Never before and never since have I been so beat on, denigrated and trashed — even by teachers and school administrators.

I see why most people never do this because everyone and everything tries to stamp your head back into that hole. Thanks the gods I was born so stubborn.