I was peeking in again at this long Making Light thread about dysfunctional families, and I noticed something.

Almost all of the posters and the recipients of abuse are women. I’m guessing this is because women are expected/required in our culture to do the emotional heavy lifting in a family.

Fewer women probably – as I did – say “fuck all ya’ll” and never talk to any family ever again.

One of the best things I ever did.

This is not to say that the women in question are behaving incorrectly. Everyone is at least partially and sometimes wholly a construct of their social milieu. Only a few people break even partially free. I think I was one of them, but then again I have a very atypical personality profile and am a frequent outlier.

I don’t do regret very well as I have a good life and thus all my choices ineluctably lead me to where I am now, but the only opportunity cost I am paying is that I never got to know my nieces.

Every choice comes with a debt and a payment, even the ones we don’t realize. Such is living in this world.