An ex-girlfriend of mine said to me, “You just do what you want, no matter what anyone says or does. And it pisses me off that you get away with it!”

She didn’t mean it as a compliment but I took it as one. Part of it is just being male. We can get away with more. It’s not fair, but that’s the way it is. But another part is that you can get away with much more with Columbo-like bumbling and a smile than any other method in the universe.

Most people watched Columbo for entertainment. I watched it as an instruction manual.

Served me well my whole life. Part of it is my natural personality — I tend to ask dumb questions and be terrible, far more terrible than anyone else the first time I try something — so it’s easy to amplify that.

And oh yeah, just one more thing….