One of the many, many reasons I love my partner is that she has never once told me to “just relax” or anything even vaguely like that.

I’ve spent the last 20 years trying to not be So Intense, to Just Relax For Once, but tonight Logan said, “that’s one of the things I like about you, that you’re intense,” & I felt something inside me loosen. Find people who love you for who you are, not who you force you to be.

— Hannah (Schaefer) Evans (@hannahschaef) June 5, 2018

I am intense by nature. Watchful. My life experiences only heightened these tendencies. It’s not going away, nor do I want it to. I am not nervous, afraid, anxious or unhappy. I am just intense and alert. This is my default state. There is nothing wrong with me or with it. There is absolutely nothing to fix. Telling me to “just relax” won’t do anything but make sure I avoid you in the future.

This is me — not relaxing since 1976, and loving every minute of it.