One of the rare times I did try to chat up a girl at a bar it didn’t go that well, for strange reasons. We’d already been talking for a while so it started out just fine. She was engaged and interested. But then she asked me what I did.

Her: So, what do you for a living?

Me: I’m a photojournalist and a paratrooper. I jump out of planes and do stories in the Army, 82nd Airborne Division.

Her: Oh, come on! You can tell me what you really do. You don’t have to impress me. Just tell me.

Me: That’s what I really do. I like it most of the time. But it can be a hard life.

Her: *shakes her hands in front of her* Ugh, I’ve just had it with all these guys making up these cockamamie stories to impress me! It’s just so lame!

Me: ????

Then she stormed off. No great loss, I’ll warrant. But still, funny. At least I got a story out of it. Should’ve told her I was an accountant or something, though.