When you look around at average Americans, bloated, unhealthy, incurious, and incapable of walking across a parking lot without chugging harder than the 3:10 to Yuma, you almost feel like a different species comparatively. Blame it on capitalism, call it a choice, ascribe it to mind control rays emanating from Area 51 — but none of that makes it any better.

Do I think I am superior to most of them? Yes, yes, I do. Deal with it fuckos.