Something I think that is very telling about the modern belief that all relations, even romantic ones, are about power is that the types who believe this almost always get the power differential reversed. That is, assuming it even exists or is real — which it usually is not, or is inconsequential even if one is present.

For instance, a 25-year-old dating someone 40. Assuming the 25-year-old is a woman, she has vastly more choices in the dating market if she is at all attractive. 80% of men of any age and 10% of women would potentially want to be with her. For an average forty year old man? That’s maybe 2% of women and 0.5% of men. Below average? Then it’s basically 0% in both categories. Quite the potential actual real-world power differential there and it’s not really on the side of the older person!

Of course making relationships about power differentials is fucking full-on crazy evil. I can’t think anything outside of war more harmful to human flourishing. But it has become so pervasive it’s hard to get out of that frame of thought. They won, ruining much and gaining little.

Evil, evil.