This is nice and all, but I will never, ever, ever ride a bike on a road in the US, and especially not in the South.

Why? People will fucking kill you, that’s why. Some deliberately, out of anger, but most because they are bad and inattentive drivers.

Literally every person I’ve ever known here who is an avid biker has had at least one bad accident involving a car.

I don’t like hospitals. Don’t want to spend time in one so I can make a liberal smile. And I like riding bikes. I wish I could do it. But I’ve already put my life at risk enough times. I must be running out of lives at this point, so biking on streets of death is not for me.