Not doing something is the easiest thing in the world for me. Not signing up for Facebook? Done! I’ve continued to not do that for a very long time, and that simple inaction has made me look smarter and smarter by the day.

I should keep not doing all the things because it’s just so easy not to do something. All the shit I keep not doing is making me relatively more brilliant by the second.

If I keep not doing shit — and every indication is that this will be the case — soon, I will become a pure burst of light, unfathomable to normal mortals.

My dad ages ago would scream at me for all the things I didn’t do because I hated them. Turns out that it was a wise life strategy after all.